A journey of a thousand miles

Wrong decision to go Melaka on Labour day..

2011-05-18T14:19:00.000+08:00

Went to Melaka on the 1st of May that day..
It was a bad choice to go on public holiday.. Wasted half of the day in jammed..
Went to Jonker Street at about 5.20pm and the pasar malam have started..
Even it is still so early but there have been so many people ad..

Been so hungry when reach there due to the jammed we park about 20 mins walk away from jonker street, so we went all the way to this shop name Jonker 88 to have our dinner.

On the left of this picture is Cendol and on the right is Ais Kacang. It was very very good.

And this is what we ate for dinner at Jonker 88 due to there is too many people, we only able get to eat their Asam Laksa.

After Jonker 88, we walk around the street and found this nice and special food.. Beacon roll..
They have few choices there,...

We took the beacon sausage to try as we never know how do it taste... It was very very delicious.. hoping to have one now while typing this post.. haha..

And then we saw this uncle cook kuih lobak with the special kind of kitchen turner.. try to see the picture carefully.. the turner is at the well cook kuih lobak there.. :) he must have selling this for several years..

and this was our last stop before went back.. Satay celup...
There is 2 shop famous in Melaka..
1 of it is Ban Hin Lee and the other wan was Capital..

Thanks for viewing.. :) Will post some others as soon as i discover it...

The first blog with new plot..

2011-04-12T23:02:00.000+08:00

One month ago, I have purchase a new phone which is HTC DESIRE HD A9191.
This is the first smart phone that i have ever purchase after a long consideration.

Let me introduce it to you all a bit, it was weight 164g that some of my friend would say that it is heavy but it weight ok for me because after all it is 4.3" inches screen that is the same as HTC HD2.
It is running on Android 2.2 software which is quite known now a days after iOS and Windows Mobile.
It is better from IPhone 4 through out the phone and it lose to IPhone 4 for only a reason, which is not as much application and program as IPhone but I believe Android is working on it. :)
The camera of this HTC Desire HD is 8 MP which is better than IPhone only 5 MP and the youtube streaming of this phone is fast compare to IPhone if your network is good, no lack.

I'm not trying to promote this phone, but it serious worth the price it is as I can see the difference because my friend were using IPhone 4.
This is a friendly user phone which my small litter sister also manage to use it after 1 guidance from me.
It only cost me RM 1399 after all from DIGI. ^^

From this moment, from this hour, from this post..

2011-04-12T22:24:00.000+08:00

From this post onwards, I think I shall make some changes on my blog.
Instead of weasel out my bad feeling, bad mood, every small little thing that is about me,
I shall change to blogging out about some nice food, nice places, experience, products and so on.
Which is I think it would be more realistic than before from posting only
my feeling and my stupid heart word which make all of you bored. :)

From this post onwards, this blog will fill in with all my experience of journey of a thousand miles of mine only.

Thanks for following.^^

Wish??

2011-03-13T13:23:00.000+08:00

hmm.. at this time.. this post..
I was trying to sort out what i want, what i like, and what i prefer..
I have live 20 years and going into 21 now..
I dun really know what i want and what i expect from myself..

I love to travel..
I love to take picture of others but not myself..
I love to see people smile when with me..
I love to be rich.. not really really rich but just rich enough for me not to worry bout my expenses.
I love to learn more bout technology..
I love to have a car i like..
I love superbike..
I love to have my own house..
I love to share what people have..

.. at this rate..
i was unable to have any above..
i dunno how to make those wish success..
but i just wish to have all those above...

I like to travel a lot.. Travel to see different things.. Travel to know this world better..
but now i havent even travel finish malaysia yet..

I love to take picture of others and stuff but i never own a camera yet.. i hope to get a DLSR but it is too far away from my budget...

I love to see people around me smile becoz from that smile i will know that they are happy when with me..:)

I love to be rich.. becoz i have work so many years to get myself out of poor stage that i can see people suffer to survive without money, as what i could see from my parent when they always need money but it never work far...

I love to learn more about technology.. this might becoz i have choose to learn technology as my hobby.. but i never get a really good opportunity after my previous work..

I love to have a car i like becoz it make those people that i fetch feels comfortable when with me driving to some place..

I love superbike.. becoz it make me feels that it will ride me to some other space that no one can go..

I love to have my own house so that me and my family no need worry when people say wanna add rental fees and want us to move..

I love to share what people have becoz life is short.. we might not experience the same like others.. but we may share what path that they walk before and what they see..

But when do all of this will happen??
No one could able to tell me..
As human can never predict future...

Betray!!

2011-03-02T19:13:00.000+08:00

Recently i have learn a lesson again..
Previously I thought, people that u know less than 1 or 2 years only will betray u because they are not close enough with u..
But.. things tend to happen in the other direction..
I have think so much of this fren of mine..
We know each other since secondary skul that i even thought i can believe him and share with him what have i been experience and what have i gain.. but ended up betray is what i get payback..
Trusted him so much that i even tell him all my secret but ended he use me to get some better offer..
Do human act like this?? Do every human just think of their own benefit??
Or am i too easy to trust others??

I have so many things in mind that i wish to include and share with him..
but things have happen to be opposite now...
My business plan that thought of include him.. have to change now..
I dunno who else to believe in this world if fren also cannot believe..
Is there only myself in this world??
I think most probably yes...
Cause what u see and what others see is different..
Who will know what would happen after life??
Who know maybe after life u are just nothing..
Maybe u just forget everything..
Maybe u dun even know what is happening..
Maybe there is just no after life..

It's time to decide..

2011-02-22T18:54:00.000+08:00

It's been a year I never get a chance to update here...
Lot of things have happen..
Lot of things have change..
Economy is raising up again now in this year..
Food , Petrol all the price have been raise too..
With this economy..
All the things have not been happen in the good way..
After all the economy issue occurs, this is the time my company wanna renew contract..
With so less increment that does not even exceed RM100 after been service here 1 year..
With this kind of increment from this company, I can guarantee my future is empty..
It's time to decide either continue stay here or seek for other opportunity..

Things have change, Age have grow, Life have become harder to survive as time pass by..
Things that we requested become more and more too...

Oh yea... This is my first car i just get it this year..

Even though this is a secondhand car but this is the first property i made for myself.. :)
My coming target was 5 figure income, a house and vacation..
God bless me!! ><

Wat a hard day.. A relief after all..

2010-06-16T20:54:00.002+08:00

Here is something bout me to share here..

It was 15th June yesterday, when i were awake i already late to work hence plan on a half day leave but end up late 3 mins to work still..

sigh..

It was a good weather yesterday..

When i were on the way back home, unexpectedly i took my seat belt when i drove..

It was a smooth way to home at first..
Later on, after a few KM that i have drove, suddenly there was a car emergency brake in front of me.. Hence, with an immediate respond i press on my brake and clutch as well since my iswara was a manual car and i were thinking "oh shit, this time i gonna bang the car in front" but luckily i able to stop my car on time and there were like 5 cm distance from my car to the front car..
and immediately pop up in my mind that "phew.. luckily didn't bang"

Unfortunately, after the word pop up in my mind.. A loud sound "PHANG" from behind and a big impact fall on me and chock me a while..
Immediately i horn and tell myself " My car were gone this time.."

and once i come out from my car i see a car behind me was injured terribly and it was a KELISA.. and i thought i gonna walk back home this time ..

But .. when i turn around and have a look on my car..
Phew.. relief.. it was just a scratches on my car and number plat broken but the opponent car was broken bumper, and the whole front went near to the engine..

It was amazing that my car is fine and i were fine too..

Here after, i went home and have a good sleep till the morning with my blanket on.. :)

What a relief after all.. hehe..

Dr34mz...

2010-03-13T09:46:00.002+08:00

Recently lot of things have happen.. Especially to people around me but i seems not updated much..
Maybe it was becoz i have been less hang out with them, so I'm not updated..
But nvm, as usual my life just continue..
but lot of dream i have made.. regard friend, work and so so..
Working in Samsung as a Call Center Agent it seems to be not a gud job to have,
Many things have gone thru within this 3 months,
and recently i have dream bout lot kind of stupid dream..
after working in Samsung.. eventually.. when u are sleeping the daily routine of work will also appear in ur dream,
Have been enough stupid dream recently.. Make me feel that night is terrible even it is the best time to rest myself..

LIFE LIFE LIFE....

NEW YEAR COMING!!

2010-01-25T20:29:00.002+08:00

New year coming soon..

i hereby wish all my friend a HAPPY & PROSPERITY NEW YEAR..
new year, new year..

chinese believe that everythin come in new way for a new year..

which mean a new days, a new life, a new hope and so on..

but for me ..

it seem that no different at all this year..

everything seems to be normal, maybe it is becoz i am too normal and too poor this year..

hehe...

that is why everyting seems normal to me..

hehe..

btw..

hope it is a new start for all my friend which need the year to be in new way... :)

Hope all my friend will enjoy this chinese new year which coming soon.. :)

Update Update!!

2010-01-10T16:16:00.003+08:00

It's been a month since the last time i update here..
Now i were trying to start my life all over again, just started to work in Samsung for a week..
It seems not bad and at least better than where am i were previously..
But i truly learn a lesson from the previous job..
A very pricey lesson which i wont forget it for my life..
Employer is really so scary and unpredictable..
I were in service with this company about 2 yrs..
2 yrs is not a short period and it is not a short time to waste..
I were doing all my best and all i can all this while just for the company but...
at last i get a hard kick right middle of my ass and fly directly to a mountain which full of shit..
Never been expect all this.. but it just happen like that..
On the last day of my service, the sales just when gone suddenly and just gone like that..
and what have they did is just put the blame on me and i gonna bear the lost money..
FUCK IT!! AND THANKS SO MUCH TO E-LIFE MANAGEMENT LEVEL..
At last i truly see how good is E-LIFE management level..
AS A LESSON I TRULY HOPE MY FRIEND WILL NOT GET INTO THE SAME SITUATION AS ME.. DO NOT BELIEVE PEOPLE JUST BY THEIR OUTLOOK OR JUST BY HOW THEY TREAT U.. PUT MORE TIME TO SEE PROPERLY ONE PERSON.. IT IS NOT THAT EASY TO DECIDE IS THAT PERSON IS WORTH TO BELIEVE OR WORTH FOR US TO FOLLOW THEM TO THE WAR FIELD..

Fucking Bad luck!!

2009-12-12T19:29:00.003+08:00

Firstly, get an offer from P1 to work there with RM2300 salary, after 2 times of interview with my qualification, salary that they offer have been reduce to RM1800.. LOL..

Nvm..

2nd, plan to change my iswara aeroback to Proton Saga M-Line.. At first they say can help me settle everything and i would only need to spend 5000 to change new car.. then it become i need to spend 10k just to change the car.. Fcuk!!

3rd, instead of change car, i plan to buy the new Proton Saga and as i hear from them just need around 1 or 2 k to purchase the new car.. ended up they say need 4K to change new car..

LOL!! which means i fail again.. NVM..

4rd, car in bad condition suddenly, fixed it with RM1000..
NVM..

5th, 2 days after getting fixed my car.. get bang by a fucking fucked up wira which reverse didnt see car.. then signal light break and still lucky he got it fixed..

6th, 2 days after bang, get pao by a stupid keling tow car fellow RM800 for loan not being pay for 4 months.. after all, i go bank check and they say if get tow max also 300 only..
CCB!! Keling Penipu(to my indian fren, no offence please)..

7th, 2 days after again.. right after work, my gf and me plan to go for Cheras Pasar Malam.. And some bad memory happen again.. CB.. Another "Keling".. In an empty dark junction near eric house where i were plan to use kampung jawa way to federal.. A car suddenly appear from another junction and horn me MAX.. then follow tightly at my back.. so i let him cut.. half way he cut.. he try push me to a side to fight.. after try to push 2 3 times but fail then he chow ad..

LOL!! damn fucking bad luck.. like there is something following me and fooling me for this months..
ARRgHH!! how could i stop this..
Hope everything will end as soon as possible..
I wan a relax life my god.. just a simple and relax life.. nothing much..
Hope for god bless..

Birthday route 09"

2009-11-24T00:33:00.002+08:00

Firstly..
Have an opening at Station 1 with mc thong and wan jun.. with a bucket of beer and some poker game..^^ but mostly were drink by me.. which coz me a little blur..
then right after that, went to my gf house but once i went in i were asleep... haha.. in living room.. then waken up by her dog with a continuously bark for 30 mins then get asleep back and waken up again by phone call and lastly waken up by her sis watchin cartoon in the early morning since skul holiday started..
then chilling there in her house for the whole noon till 4 and then we went for breakfast+lunch+dinner , planned for "2012" but both jj and sunway TGV were fully buy so we ended up watch movie at her house till 2.30..
haha.. so lifeless..
lol..this is how my birthday pass this year..
btw.. at least i still receive a birthday cake and a present..
haha..

Does Environment change effect in a person change?

2009-10-29T21:38:00.004+08:00

So much thing have change lately, u were start to work as full-time back and i am getting more and more busy as i am trying to get a good score in sales at the end of the year to regain my reputation towards someone and myself..

and so a gaps or maybe a wall between us have appear..

couldn't able to stop it yet we were fought already..

end up relation have being complicated, this have lead u to feel hard to communicate wit me now..

will this end everything??

Is this mean i am losing u??

was the quarrel cause by me??

none of us know..

but to accept wat have happen and cure our relation to carry on our life..

Admitting it is mine fault was the best solution cause i also dunno it was my faulty or urs..

at last i have admit it and u have gain more freedom from me but i can feel there is still a gaps in me and u..

seeing u going out with others without me controlling ur time, i feel the pain in me, pain which come from the bottom of my heart..

cause i gonna see u sleeping late midnight to finish ur part time again and waking up at early morning which make u look so tired..

i hope i could help u but i fail..

fail just becoz i dunno chinese so i unable to help u and wat i could do is just sitting here and staring at the wall hoping u would finish it early..

our time is getting more and more un-match..

u are gaining another life now..

a new working life..

a life that i couldn't block and a life that will take away u from me it seems..

seeing u step by step making distance on us lead me to feel guilty and hate my work..

which is also the main cause that making us apart now..

i hope i would able to change it..

i promise myself to get over this..

all i need is u back like normal now..

still waiting and worry u here is a

drizzling dark night which makes me feel more sad

Stupidity on Family background

2009-10-14T14:48:00.003+08:00

Izit a good or bad family background going to lead the way of their kid being grow???
A good family background izit going to born a good and full of future mankind???
Family background is something we as a child can't choose coz we got no right to choose which family to born from.. It's all set by fate, is this mean that a kid born in a bad or poor family going to lead their son to the poor generation too??
Why does human have to view a person personality and future based on their parent pass??
Izit so important a parent pass to him?
I'm sure a kid who is born in poor family can do better than those which born to have a good family background, poor family kids works more harder to get what they wan.. This made them more appreciate what they have than those rich kid..
Why as a person which have survive in this kind of rich and poor world can't just categorize a person by that person enthusiasm and work to carry on their life but have to categorize them from their family pass???
Izit there is a confirm statement that stated on their forehead saying that they will not success no matter how??
Is this stupidity human behavior must have on everyone mind itself??
I just dun understand how an age person view on us..
There is no explanation to be found by me, can someone explain it??

Dearest Birthday..

2009-10-08T10:56:00.002+08:00

Her birthday is coming up soon.. just few days more.. very soon.. but i have plan nothing for her..
At first plan to buy her a present which she wish to buy herself for so long ad but have been block by her to do so due to that present cost a lot and i always have money problem.. Sigh!!(white hair grow more as i sigh):P
then i plan to go for a vacation with her so i have take leave for 4 days from 19th till 22nd this month and have been approve without a question but her work is too much till i dun think this plan gonna work.. means my 4 days off gonna throw to sea ad.. but hope there is changest.. sigh!!
Arggh!! Wat can i do for her somemore?? She dun have time, i dun have money!!
Wat can i do??
wat can i do??
wat can i do??

Fail again..!!

2009-10-08T10:53:00.003+08:00

Once again i have fail to quit smoking..
lol.. it's been like how many times i have told myself to stop smoking but still not work..
everyone include myself was asking me to stop smoking but why am i still continue??
am i addicted?? i dun think so.. but why i just can't stop smoking??
F***..Fail again!!
Sigh...!!
Sorry.. i fail upon wat u wish me to do...

S.T.O.P!!! I need to STOP!!!

2009-09-09T19:34:00.002+08:00

This is the 3rd time i say i wanna stop ad..
I wish i can make it after this box..
I really hope that i can this time..
At least from now onwards stop buying box..
By this way at least would make me smoke lesser but will need some sponsor sometimes..
Actually there is a reason i plan for this 3rd time of stopping myself from fag..
Can feel that my lung is keep on pulling me day by day..
It's giving me ache in lung everyday, every few hours will surely have few times, plus...
from last time till now i ad got health problem..
but still haven't go check la... It's been 2 years i gone through here pain there pain.. sometime lung sometimes stomach sometimes head and.... lots more..
This pain is keep on repeating happen to me like earth have four season,
different is just it happen faster than season.. it just change in few days time..
Maybe i need a rest, this is wat i always tell myself but still i cant make it..
But anyhow, i guess i really need to stop fagging as a daily habit ad..
O else, u guys surely going to see me in Hospital soon..
wish i really can make it this time..

Human Attitude..

2009-08-26T10:57:00.003+08:00

How should a leader be?
Good at everything? or serious in everything?
I've try to be a serious leader in everything before but it has coz me a big sacrifice,
everyone seem to scare to communicate with me, one by one is being force to quit job becoz of me..
why?? izit serious in work also wrong??
now.. i have try being a very very good leader to my staff,
giving them watever they wan,
allow wat ever they request,
but the feedback was more worse,
all the work is not being done,
all the work was wait for me to be done,
become a daily customer service counter,
getting screw from ahead saying my performance was drop...
ARRGHH!! frustrated to work life....!!!!
why izit when i treat u all too good u will climb over me and why izit when i treat u all normal and be serious in work u all will hate me??
I thought u would have help me somethin at least for this month but u have disappointed me dude, once and once u lie to me.. i just keep it in heart..
have u serious in work?? ur time were 40% on computer, 30% on call and 20% on smoke and only 10% u are doing work.. am i right???
Do not compare me and u, dude...
U have no right to compare that dude...
Am i really being too kind to everyone??
now am very tired,
need a rest..
but no money, planning for a part time which can i do at home..
anyone have idea on this?
Really tired..

L1f3

2009-08-24T15:04:00.005+08:00

I think it's time for me to update something... hehe..
It's been a while never update here coz recently there were nothing special happen..
But here u go a camel story..

son: Mom, may i ask some question?

mom: sure, why son, is there something bothering u?

son: Why do camels have humps??

mom: well son, we are desert animals, we need the humps to store water and we are known to survive without water.

son: OK, then why are our legs long and our feet rounded??

mom: son, obviously they are meant for walking in the desert better than anyone does.

Son: just one more question mom...

mom: yes, dear??

Son: OK, then why are our eyelashes long? sometimes it bother my sight.

mom: my son, those long thick eyelashes are your protection cover. they help to protect eye from desert sand and wind

son: i see.. so the hump is to store water when we are in desert, the leg are to walking through the desert and these eyelashes protect my eye from the desert sand......................................
Then WAT THE HELL ARE WE DOING IN ZOO????!!!

mom: ....

moral: skills, knowledge, experience and ability are only useful if u are in the right place..
where are u now?

As u should know...
Smooth roads never make good drivers
Smooth sea never makes good sailors
Clear skies never makes good pilots
Problem and hassle free life NEVER makes a strong person
Be strong enough to accept the challenges of Life
Don't ask life, "why me?"
Instead say "TRY ME"

Watever can happen in life...

2009-08-13T16:15:00.002+08:00

Whenever we were in this situation where by we can see a girl angry and the guy where still thought that he were right, this word most probably will appear most of the time "WHAT EVER"..
Never thought that this word appear in my mind when i am angry o piss off but it just happen like that and just make me stun every time i think back of this case...
How could someone define the word "FRIENDSHIP or BRO" in this world??
could any of u help me to answer this out there?
Never thought of my fren/bro, which is so good all the time will did this??
in not even 2 months time..
Bro, not even 2 months time.. while my blog is still updated bout her sometimes...
Is this wat a friendship call??
Worse thing is.. u both were beyond the stage i expect.. how could this be??
All I've done can be just forget in less then 2 months??
Never thought of this... really!!
If this guy were another person, maybe i will still feel better but u.. u as the most close with me when i am with her.. how could u..
The word WATEVER just appear in my mind like this bro...
Are u still treat me as bro??
I could only refer this matter to another person we both close with..
He also dunno wat to tell me...
could u answer me?? C...z ... please.. i hope this doesnt stop our friendship..
maybe this word would save us WATEVER.. but it just wont last...

P.S.
pm me bout wat is friendship please.. i would like to know from all of u that read this.. THX

That's why- MLTR

2009-08-08T21:02:00.001+08:00

Baby want you tell me why there is sadness in your eyes
I don't wanna say goodbye to you
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head

You're the one who set it up
Now you're the one to make it stop
I'm the one who's feeling lost right now
Now you want me to forget every little thing you said
But there is something left in my head

I won't forget the way you're kissing
The feelings so strong were lasting for so long
But I'm not the man your heart is missing
That's why you go away I know

You were never satisfied no matter how I tried
Now you wanna say goodbye to me
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head

I won't forget the way you're kissing
The feelings so strong were lasting for so long
But I'm not the man your heart is missing
That's why you go away I know

Sitting here all alone in the middle of nowhere
Don't know which way to go
There is so much to say now between us
There ain't so much for you
There ain't so much for me anymore

I won't forget the way you're kissing
The feelings so strong were lasting for so long
But I'm not the man your heart is missing
That's why you go away I know

P.S. specially posted to someone

A night that will never be forget!!

2009-08-08T19:00:00.002+08:00

Thanks for everything on this pretty and calm night,
will always be in my memory,
a past of ours, or maybe a dream.
even it's just a short time we were having together..
waited for so long at last i know wat are u thinking and wat u really wan..
it's gonna be sad for me but at least i know wat is in ur mind..
thanks for everythin on this night.. really appreciate it..
knowing that u will never wan to let go but no choice,
make me feel it's worth for me to do everything just for u in this past few weeks..
but somehow i hope it doesn't happen as the way u say..
Thanks!!(^ ^)

Amazing Stuff That We will never seen after this

2009-08-06T14:27:00.002+08:00

Did u ever seen this number appear together in ur clock ??
"1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9"

You will see this this time on ur clock soon..

On the 7th of August of this year, the time and date will be

12:34:56 07/08/09

This will never happen in your life again??!!!!

Notice bout this??
Pretty amazing stuff i guess..

P.S:Receive it from e-mail so i plan to post it in my blog.. hehe :P

Bored-ness

2009-08-02T13:25:00.003+08:00

I'm bored!!!

Everyday of my life is just work sleep work sleep making me feel no life,
Frustrated, tension, loneliness, boring, have been grow day by day in my life,
Feeling lonely made me feel i'm already disappear in everyone mind,
Everyday after work, the only place to go is just HOME!
other than that, really can't figure out where else could i go..
Even can feel that my blog is getting more and more emo..
Where the hell is everybody?? Where is life?? Where my life have been disappear??

P.S
just to update my blog

R3l4t10n5h1p

2009-07-23T10:14:00.003+08:00

There are lot kind of relationship but which of those relationship do u think it will last the longest??
Love?? friend?? or watever that u can state out?? (PM me)
to me...
all those relation is like so meaningless, all mankind mind are so easily change..

now they might be ur best friend, later u are just someone they know o someone u hate,

after all... forget this person and all the past ad,
does us as a human should behave like this?
Have seen a lot this kind of attitude since i was small from those elder and i choose not to believe in this statement,
but.. when i have really come into this world, what i have found is, all the relationship will not last long.. even someone say "u are best friend la!!","BRO.. u are always my bro!!" these word doesn't last long in their heart, am i correct???
even some husband and wife also would not last long. this is prove!
but why?? if as a husband and wife relationship also cant last long then which type of relation only can last long?
Was wondering this question for a long time but somehow i got no answer and another question appear! Why do i care so much?? Why do i did the best as i can to maintain every kind of relationship?? since watever i did also will produce the same result.. should i give up?? should i??
Maybe i too care..
Maybe is becoz i prefer long long relationship..
I care for everyone around me, everyone..
but.. wat i get?? getting more and more lonely day by day..
Getting very tired nowadays for being wat i am, for doing wat i did all the past,
Relationship is wat??
It is just something making me tired and more tired everyday.

The other side of myself

2009-07-19T20:07:00.002+08:00

Phobia of meet people have grow stronger..
People is asking me nowadays.. Wat have happen to u?? wat have happen?? are u ok??
and wat i can only say is "I'm fine, still survive!"...
I'm getting more and more cruel nowadays..
Maybe becoz of the loneliness feeling in my heart all the while have lead me to change,
feel alone all the day and night have make me getting sick..
seeing everyone laughing so happily sometime just make me feel more sad..
especially seeing u with a beautiful smile in those pict which rarely i can see in the past..
and this have lead me to think that everyone of u were living happily without me but with my exist around u all those smiles just disappear easily.. like i were just meant to be a spoiler to ruin all the beautiful things that happen in this world

Employee..

2009-07-08T12:26:00.002+08:00

As a good employee u must always be in the best condition no matter what is the goal being set...
Keeping urself update is very important also..
Achieve the goal is most important part..
Been do all the best for my company 1 year and 7 months..
been achieve the most highest sales and profit outlet in this company..
since then, boss were very look up on me..
In this year, i have been promoted twice from staff to assistant supervisor then again to supervisor and in charge in a broken outlet which he hope that i would drag up this outlet to something like the previous outlet i work..
never been thought that this will be a though road until pass a month of being promote to supervisor position..
the goal too high.. the tension i having is too much till i have been headache for week ad.. everything is like empty.. no database, no staff that can be rely, no customer, no sales.. been try really hard to achieve higher profit ad but sales were down..
thought that at least profit have gain boss wont be so depress but..
result i get was not wat i expected.. feedback i get was he totally upset with my performance which i provide to this outlet..
Hoping there is some increase in sales and profit next month and hit the target..
working as a employee is always not easy.. once ur performance was not good surely u going to receive negative feedback..

The feeling that never end..

2009-07-06T18:47:00.003+08:00

I was on friendster just now..
I see picture of her in her fren profile..
My heart were stun for few second once i reach the pict which got her,
i thought it was my wrong feeling,
after a while i see her in another pict again..
same effect appear, i get stun again..
the same feeling like i get stun in first time..
never thought that this feeling would appear again but it just come out suddenly..!
wat should i do??
wat should i do??
can i just ignore it?
wat else can be done??
it's already been long time ago..
why the feeling..........
arrgh!!
struggling now...
Shit.. should i continue???
help!!

Distance

2009-07-05T17:43:00.002+08:00

The neglected house is getting more and more cold recently,
the surrounding have change a lot too..
people were moving out from here to others location and plan for their life..
but this empty house have never change..
situated in the same location and same goal..
wishing someone to enter the house..
wish that someone can make it warm back..
wish that he would provide help and happiness to people around him..
but no one knows he is being neglected..
no one knows that he do need help..
and everyday while he was trying to help people around him he is getting weaker and weaker..
helping people without hoping for pay back and even helping people with loss from himself..
close house is moving one by one to other location due to some change in life..
but this empty house still remain there..
while the distance is getting further and further..
this empty house day by day is getting colder and colder...
neglected feeling is also getting stronger..
no friend around, no real friend which can believe to talk to..
feeling unsafe and lonely all the moment of life from now on...

felling sick all the while have made this empty house to feel more lonely and cold..
even sick he is still helping the others..

hope i was not like the empty house.. feeling lonely is real sucks..
good luck to empty house..

Wat is love about?

2009-07-05T09:58:00.003+08:00

Love?? thought i have been through a deep one before and were believe she was the only one know and care the most bout me even treat her as my soul mate like no one can replace her, even try to let go everything just to be with her, just to see her, sacrifice that never end... let go all my on hand job even dun care i will lost everything in this world just to be with her just to see her, find out all the possible way to meet her.. but now.. i heard that all the relation between us were just becoz u care and know bout me the most.. if this was the reality i really dunno what should i say.. my soul mate have turn down to a true friend which willing to give me everything she have.. and i still believe that she know me the most till that day she ask me am i punisher and thought i were so stupid go pretend another guy just to make my life busier.
Is this still called love?
I love her , i sacrifice every shit just for her, but ended up?
tear droping, which been not drops from my eye since i were 12 yrs old i guess, not even the day one of my best fren pass away...
worry her like death coming next second for every moment that she doesn't message me..
not able to eat anything when she were not contact me for more than few hour..
can't sleep at night if i didnt receive a call from her..
admit that i am wrong everytime we quarrel...
quit smoking..
message her whenever she can-nearly lost my job once becoz were told by my head that i keep on messaging and not working properly..
driving without heart.. almost accident for times.. just a few cm away to meet death..
drunk every week..
daily sleep for only 4 hours even the day i were sick..
I have been do my best to remain this relation but wat have happen??
And now? my reputation have totally gone in some of u all i guess..
maybe i just dont deserve to be love by others...
all i hope is just a long relationship with her but ended up?

shit man..!! why am i wasting my time typing all this shit?? It's over..IT"S OVER!!!
now.. wat i know is.. if i were still continue with her i'm sure one day i gonna be dead.. break up and together break up and together back make me really suffer..
and before i end this post i just wanna add something someone have told me before, and quite sure she will remember it
"NO ONE WERE RIGHT OR WRONG IN A RELATIONSHIP"

Judge

2009-07-04T11:13:00.003+08:00

As a human which survive in earth, i think everyone have done a mistake even jesus did that i guess but.. how many of them will realize it? Not until the day they lost something! I'm just a simple human, i do did wrong thing before but i did done some correct thing also.. but how many percent of each thing in right and wrong that i have done will being notice by the pupil around??
100% wrong things that i done will totally here and there at peoples' mouth and end up created another story and only 10% of good thing only that i have done being known by people around.. What is this?? Is it all the human like to see things from only one side? After listening to one side conversation, directly the other side will just get blame beside the listener was not realize what have really happen and not even interested to go find out the answer!!
FUCK!! is all the human in this world see things only from their own side and not the others??
Be civilize man!! what era are us now man?? U are living in this mature world compare to last time but your mind is still so retarded??
Kinda tired to see people around me judge someone without seeing what have really happen! Maybe by not a fair judging might make u all feel happier and live better.. if so does u feel! then carry on... but one day, i am sure one day, u will remember back what have u read today in my blog...

Wat have happen to me??

2009-06-29T21:28:00.002+08:00

Wat have happen to me???
My mood were totally out of my control...
Izit becoz i too tired?? I were very ok this morning.. till noon... suddenly i feel headache then dizzy again.. after that stomach ache... then feel wanna vomit.. then headache again.. since then my mood was totally out of control.. a while was ok a while was not..
Already 4 customer that i make them walk out this shop with anger..
Why?? What happen?? i even scolded all my fren which msn me..
I was not like this normally.. This few day i have been totally out of control!!
Headache and dizzy again now..
Izit becoz too much of work? izit becoz i am lonely?? izit becoz i am too tired??
Stop asking me why?? coz i also dunno why? Sorry everyone...
I really out of control...
Feel like whack someone, feel like scold everyone which talk to me.. i ad try my best to control myself at last i lost control to customer...
I need a rest?? Maybe.. but i dun wan to be alone.. and i dun wan to stuck in this working shit also.. wat can i do?? i really very tension now...
Feeling sick..Feeling angry.. Feeling loneliness..
Wat the fuck did i wan from myself??????
Pain all over my body have made my mood more worse..
I think There is one girl can make me control back myself but she is been busy this 2 days..
past few days i was ok and i can control myself very well while i was chatting with her whole day.. and i was very happy and relax when talk to her..
This 2 days when she is busy i was totally out of control..
Wat is this?
Wat happen to me?
I'm very tired now...
Wat can i do? feeling really really weak..
HELP!!

Where is my dream??

2009-06-27T11:02:00.004+08:00

Haiz.. 2 years time were just wasted like this.. Friends which i know and going the same way as me were here and there all over malaysia now and i am still here at klang.. Seeing each of them preparing stuff to leave here for further study, i suddenly feel my heart were flying some where else which i dun expect it to be.. my heart were following the flow now.. wish i could able to enter uni also.. haiz.. sad.. 2 years were just wasted like that without a piece of paper on hand.. STPM is really hard? no.. i dun think so if u were study properly and put all ur efford into it since u start form 6..and made a right choice in course u like.
but me? study work study work make me really tired.. ended up sleeping inside the class whole day.. and 2 month before exam only try to catch back... conclusion?? FAIL
regret is useless now.. further study have gone far away from me.. chance for a step in uni have disappear.. study is far apart of me now...
College life would not afford, Uni life screw up..
Looks like i really need to put more efford in work.. at least now i am a supervisor in a shop..
getting promoted is not as easy as i thought..
leaving the company for a better opportunity was not easy also.. Have been offer by a lot company but end up i didnt not have enough courage to leave this company..
What is ahead me? i keep on ask myself!!
Can't see anything, what ever ahead me is blank now..
My dream to explore the world have crashed too..
With my situation now, every dream of mine have gone... Life is changing towards me so fast.. Seeing people having fun while i still need to work, the feeling is real sucks..My freedom have gone too...
ARRGH!!!... Since small watever ahead me was already blank, hardly imagine my future is still blank now.. Living in this world wothout a dream is sucks!! No Finish line ahead me.. and wat i can do is just run and run and run.. Really very tired ady.. Can hardly continue run somemore but wat i can do is still carry on crawl.. My family is still waiting for me to back home..
Feeling sorrow and lonely making my strength to getting weak and weaker..

WARNING!!

2009-06-24T11:15:00.002+08:00

As a human, PLEASE make sure wat have happen before u start a quarrel with someone!! Unless u are a stupid Fucker which never been teach by ur mum and dad before!! and at here i wanna make sure one thing, i hate those fucking people that like to blame on someone and those which doesn't make clear of everythin before start blaming people!! So.. Please do make sure wat have happen before u left a post here.. hope that everyone of u was graduated by ur parent before u were here and dun be a pussy!! if u dare to post make sure u dare to let people know who are u also!! Dun try to put ur name like very scary o fierce but doesn't dare to stand out to show urself also..!! As like u name urself "punisher", do u think u are god? u are just a pussy!! "gui gui sui sui". Be a human please, if u think u are a god o punisher then just come and punish me!! no point u comment so many shit at the CBOX and name urself punisher but be a coward there!!
If u all dun understand HOW DOES A PUSSY ACT? Please refer to the CBOX which name "PUNISHER- coward, pussy fellow." a good eg. for all of u..
REMENBER!!
Dun be a pussy!!

True Friend and Love??

2009-06-18T14:38:00.002+08:00

What is true friend??
What is true love??
How many true friend and true love did a person have??
I have been through a deep relationship before and for me it was a true love.. but it's the end now.. my true love have leave me far apart now.. the feeling of love is no longer in my heart now.. I wonder where have it been.. Can hardly find it deep inside my heart now.. Maybe my true love were just ended but will there be another?? another true love?? no one have the right to answer me this question i guess.. haha XD.. sound stupid right?
By the way, How many true friend did u have?? Wat is true friend?? Who is ur true friend?? Once i were thought i have a lot of friend.. That was long time ago.. Now i can feel wat is friend means to me and who is the one which can be call friend and which is the one i should call bro.. or best friend..
I wonder could any of my fren tell me that they treat me as a true friend, a true friend which willing to help no matter when o wat, a friend which willing to share with u wat he got, a friend who willing to help u find solution... a fren which willing to come out to accompany u no matter when o wat is coming up next..
How many of u dare to say that u will do that?? how many of human that would stand up and say they willing to give wat ever they have to one person as a true friend help?? i guess there will be very less.. i am this kind of person, if i were able to help no matter how busy i also will help as long as in my memory he was one of my friend, i would never let go any of my friend no matter how i hate them..LOL.. but do i get the same feedback?? that is a secret..

Lesson to face m'sian trouble

2009-06-10T14:13:00.003+08:00

Yesterday before finish work i receive a call from KAM ask for shisha at andalas. So, after work when every shit settle i went to Al-Bidayah where the shisha placed to find for them. After shisha we plan for cybercafe and there we go we went for around 1 hour plus then we to go home. Out of so many of us which went to cybercafe, the police were only following me and after a while he started to chase me, end up stop me by side of a road which situated right beside Giant Hypermarket. Lots of people that passed by there were slowing down to see wat happen.. LOL.. After all the check that they have done, they let me go and they take an U turn at traffic light ahead which i dun think it is allow. Forget it, then i carry on to drive home. In just another 2mins of drive another police car were following me, this time they were just following right beside my car.. i wonder wat so nice to see at my car, wat make all the police pay so much attention to my car.. SWT!! then they follow me back home...
ROFL..

after all the bad luck story, here is some lesson that i learn after being block by police car so many times, which not even twice..

1st) If u see blue light following u, faster tighten ur sit belt if u havent
2nd) Do not get down the car, let them see u with sit belt.
3rd) Pass them ur I/C and License
4rd) BE READY TO ANSWER WAT EVER SHIT THEY GOING TO ASK U, with a reasonable answer( my car were a bit higer behind than others car coz i were using van absorber so they ask me "why ur car behind so high?" then i say my mum use last time, she fix it few years ad. they ask again "what is her occupation, why the car need to be so high?" lesson is be ready to answer their question and answer it with some reasonable answer. coz they were trying to trick u, once u answer wrongly some duit kopi will surely needed ad
5th) If they cant catch u anythin, be careful they will surely ask u open bonet, open ur bag, open this and that but one thing "DO NOT LET THEM TOUCH U"
after all if they didnt get anythin to trick u then u are safe, besides remember this "Dont put any stick o things that normally people use for fighting inside the car.

Sweet memory

2009-06-03T12:20:00.002+08:00

What is the best way to erase those sweet memory in the pass??
I'm very tired and not feeling well now..
Been trying was to erase those memories and stop myself from bothering her but i cant make it most of the time.. WHY??? WHY???
What should i do? What can i do to forget the past???
I though i can use work to block my brain from access to those memory but.. at last it still cant work.. It is just making me more tired, have been few times almost accident but luckily enough time to notice that..
I even try to find a replace for those memory but i cant do tat, feeling guilty to myself have block me from doing that to hurt myself..
Lot of things i have done but not one of it can replace those sweet memory in my mind.. wat should i do???
I'm really tired, really very tired.
Everyday feeling sick now..
Pain in the heart that no one will know, when will it disappear?

"Lesson of the day"

2009-06-01T20:14:00.006+08:00

"Think properly before making a choice..
DO NOT simply just say out any word before u think bout it.
Every single word that u have been said u have to mean it, there is no turning back to regret. Every human were only given a chance, make a wise choice in that chance, think before u say , promise or accept."

Proven by what i have seen.
Believe it or when somethin really happen u will regret.

Everything have just pass so fast

2009-05-28T10:15:00.003+08:00

It's been a few week pass, all the image of u are still in my head.
Every night before i can fall asleep, all ur image was flashing in my mind.
Wanted take it out but i was unable, there is nothing i can do.
U have mean a lot to me, the first and ever. How could i let u go??
Our relation become like this is all becoz misunderstand, could there be anyway to rescue it?
Always hoping for miracle to happen but there is how many miracle that really happen in ones' life? Always hoping for help but is there really someone can help me? Always hoping for u to turn back but when only it will happen?
Love, love, love.... Wat is love man????!! making people suffer..
This few days there is always a question in my mind...
HOW MANY TRUE LOVE ARE THERE IN A PERSON LIFE??
WAT IS TRUE LOVE??
I have been telling myself u are my true love as wat u know, but is this?
If YES why does it break so easily???
BREAK BREAK and BREAK again..
Does every god damn love relation have to be like this????
I have seen people who having years of relation also but why we just cant???
It's hard for me to let u go..
For u friend is always more important than bf, if u were me??
There is always people telling me this and that make u like become not worth that i love u so much even those that i treat them as best fren also said so..
but i have never let u go, i dun mind wat people thing and see me but the most important is u..
Now.. those days have pass.. u are still in my mind.. ur pict are still flashing in my mind every time when i am free especially at night.. It's the most suffering moment for me, it happen till 3,4 o'clock or sometimes till 5.. just doing nothing and staring to wall...
The last thing i ever hope now is u are living happily, no sick, no pain..
Take care.

WAT DO U WAN FROM ME????

2009-05-16T15:19:00.002+08:00

It's just almost 1 month, did u just forget wat u told me when u was asking me to back together???!! Believe in wat u say wat u did for me is for my good sake have just making me feel more sick. This night when u tell me to break up again i was like "oh god u were so good, it was so match tonight coz i was able to get drunk tonight and sleep wit a peace mind and end up i really drunk.
Again and again u say the same thing to me, once and once u get me hurt, wat do u wan me to do? u been telling me i am a very good bf ad but if so... then why i keep on facing this end? Did i wrong in believe u?? How many time have i say i dun mind and i dun mind??? Do we really need to end it in this way???
Embarrassment!!! I guess my fren will be lol now..
haha... Congrate nick!! U been dump again!!

Life is a circle..

2009-05-08T10:51:00.003+08:00

Life is really tired...
Hope to go for a holiday with someone i love but...haiz..
nvm.. as long as u are with me i'm happy ad.. miss.
your birthday is coming up this sunday dear, wish u "Happy birthday" at here first.
Hope can see u that day..

My words seem to be in someone mind recently, i have view her blog and it remind me again "life is a circle".. just like wat i told her, life is a circle u will face up and down in ur life. Funny. I have told someone something which i got no prove and never experience to.. haha.. coz all the time till now i am only feel the down.. all the time was broke, all the time was tired and all the time with all those bullshit in my head which i need to figure out solution for it..
Am I correct? Life is really a circle?
If it does, when only will i receive my level of going up in my life?
Hoping that wat i told her is true "Life Is A Circle".
So that i can enjoy my life soon.
For me life is still miserable.
Hope not everyone was like me.
oh yea... and hope that the girl will get rid of her trouble and stand up on her own feet soon..
For me, there is nothing so special recently hope there is somethin happening and unusual happen soon..

Finally...

2009-05-01T18:19:00.004+08:00

After so long of struggling to choose which job i wan to go for,
FINALLY i've choose to stay. Stay in this business field which right now i still think it suit me and was wat i wanna be..
I've been struggle in make decision int this 2 weeks, 2 weeks is a long time.. a long time to decide which job i wan the most. Hope that i was not wrong in making this decision.. and sorry to Samsung, u have give me a good offer and i know out of so many people i was the only one which get selected but i think now is still not the time for me to change field since i think i still have space to achieve my goal in this company.
Haiz...
After the decision, I thought that i would able to be happy and relax a bit but i have not been offday for 1 week ad.. haha.. and i only get my break on next sunday which means i gonna work without off for this 2 week but it's worth it.. coz today itself i already get 3 times of my normal salary which is around RM200.

After all...
Sad thing is still approach me everyday, her birthday is coming up on 10th May but.. too bad, there is nothing i can do with her or even for her coz she was unable to come out again, sad.. haiz.. Miss u dear..feel so sorry for it..can't even accompany u on ur birthday and even can't go to ur birthday party on saturday night..
maybe this is our fate.. haha.. but i will always wait for miracle to happen.. i will be strong as long as i can to face this matter which happen to us.. I will always with u unless u give me up..believe me.. i would give up anything just for you.
MISS..

Really tired ad.. was going to get sick that day but didn't happen..I have to be strong, strong enough to take care myself..As wat u wan me to be..
Wat a tired week..??!! Have been working for full few days straght..

What Is Globalization?

2009-04-25T18:15:00.002+08:00

Finally, a definition of globalization that I can understand and to which i now can relate:

Question:
What is the truest definition of Globalization?

Answer:
Princess
Diana's death.

Question:
How come?

Answer:
An English princess

with an Egyptian boyfriend

crashes in a French tunnel,

driving a German car

with a Dutch engine,

driven by a Belgian

who was drunk

on Scottish whisky,

(check the bottle before you change the spelling),

followed closely by Italian Paparazzi,

on Japanese motorcycles;

treated by an American doctor,

using Brazilian medicines.

This is sent to you by an Malaysian,

using Bill Gates's technology,

and you're probably reading this on your computer,

that uses Taiwanese chips,

and a Korean monitor,

assembled by Bangladeshi workers

in a Singapore plant,

transported by Indian lorry-drivers,

hijacked by Indonesians,

unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen,

and trucked to you by Mexican illegals....

That, my friends, is Globalization!

Perfect start, Sucks end.

2009-04-20T19:27:00.001+08:00

Everything seen to be perfect when i trying to do o plan. But end up everything was screw up.. Computer, work, life and so so...I was perfectly plan wat i need to build a computer which i have wish to have long long time ago but when i was almost ready then only find out this and that was not suit. when i settle it, internet have giving me another trouble.. can't online even i have this P1 w1max modem. It screw me up..
Beside this was a small case compare to work, I have been through briefing and interview at last end up at almost get employ and now waiting for comfirmation but screw up by the employer now..He wouldn't wanna let me go. He give me all kind of reason to make me stay longer. Am i so important to ur company?? If it does why don't u offer me somethin before i plan all this? why must u say OFFER this word when only i wanna quit the job? It is so ridiculous..
Sucks. My life experience is sucks.. From the moment i born till now i dun really remember how much good things o happy things i have been thru.. It's almost like all was a bad memory to me.. My childhood was sucks, My teenage life was sucks and now when i come into working life which i have started since teenage was also sucks..
How can i change it?
I have been telling myself life is a circle, everyone will go thru sadness, poor, and.... and everyone will go thru rich, healthy life, healthy family... It's just matter of time which means when this fellow will be good and when this fellow will be down but i have been down for so many years.. when only will i become in a good life.. People say try hard may make everythin change from bad to good but i also been try hard all this years till now.. and i am really tired, tired of my life, everyday was hoping that when i awake in the other morning my life would have change.. DREAM.. All of it was just a DREAM.. It only happen in dream world..

Life is a mess..

2009-04-18T12:05:00.002+08:00

Life full of unexpected shit, anything can happen or change in anytime without notice and expectation from you. When u put all the efford in something and expect it to happen smoothly something which opposite surely will appear. Decision by human is always not the final, things change easily even ur mind does that. Any single things that go into ur mind will change wat u have decide and think. Sad.. Why cant human just make the final decision and insist to do it fully? Why must there be a problem when it not suppost to be needed. Friends' word izit so important? A single word from friend always change ur decision and ur thinking..

Life is full of mess... when u already having a problem, surely there will be another problem for you and this will continue and continue.. till the day u die.. shit always happen. Life is miserable..I feel I have done a lot but there is more for me to be done.. WHY?? WHY?? WHY?? ?I have been work a lot this days.. but there is still mess everywhere which make me don't have a final decision and efford to continue settle the mess..and now i have awaken by this mess... I've realise the important of pretending and sacrisfice.. It is really important to make someone u care to be happy with wat they have now even it might be hurt a lot...
Nothing is important for me as long as u are happy to get a long..

Pretending tends to be the best solution

2009-04-16T19:57:00.002+08:00

Everything in my life seen to be bothering me all the time. Eg: friend, family, expenses, transport, house....
Now... most of the time was friend and work. I've been hurt one of my friend too much and i'm feeling guilty for her most of the time and the feeling on me have been spread from me to my gf. Everynight she will be telling me that she feel pity for her and ask me to find a solution for it. Wat can i do? I know that she is pretending now. She like to pretend that she is nothing a lot, maybe she feel that when she is pretending might make the others feel better and no more guilty. She have been telling the world that she was a bad person but the truth is only known by herself. I know that she is hurt a lot from me and i hope she could be able to stand up on her own and forget all the past. I hope i could ask her to stop pretending cause pretending tends to be the best solution but the truth is pretending going to make more hurt and worry to her and other people. I'm a person who like to pretend also, i've been pretend in front of everyone before and i can feel how it is when u are pretending to the world or some one u care..I hope it would end soon... very soon..
Besides, work also was a big problem for me now.. I've been work in this company for almost 18 months. It's hard for me to make my decision to leave the company now but i've been offer from another company which will provide me income more than the existing company but the problem i having is this new company only provide me 2 weeks time to quit my job now. It's cruel cause i am having a post of Assistant Supervisor here and if i have to leave this company in 2 weeks time i'm gonna make this company become a mess.. The whole company seen to be control by me and handle by me for the past 18 months i really dunno wat should i do but for my future i have to take this cruel decision but the other thing is i not sure that am this company employing me yet. I only get 80% of comfirmation and i need to go for the interview tomorrow only will know the result...
Arrghhh... must life being such hard?
Hope that everything will be overcome by me easily, i tired of my life. Hope would live better soon....

LIfe is hard

2009-04-15T10:35:00.002+08:00

I have hurt someone again, I hurt her deeply, "A" was a poor girl for wat she has experience in love matter and those day she was very very down and hate herself a lot until that she do not wanna face anyone and lock herself at the room for whole day and becoz of this we were only capable to be a day of couple and it end before 24 hours she accept me. It's becoz she fell burden to her past that she hurt so many guys before but i have given her hope, i have make her stand back up but herself and i say i'll support her no matter wat but i did not fulfill my promise to her or maybe i did not walk along with her when she just started to recovery from the pain she having and i told her my ex "B" was asking me will i be together wit her?? since i still like B and watever that i plan after we break for B i have choose YES.. This have make A heart broke once again and all the courage, confident was gone once again coz she just discover she like me ad when i got back B, she have been pretend to me that she was nothing but the moment i tell her i know she was not right ad.. i have make a girl sacrifice for me once again.. A was the second girl who sacrifice thing for me and B was the first... now there's nothing more i can do for A.. she have been hatred me and keep a distant from me. feel so guilty bout it, hope that time would turn back to the past when i did not hurt anyone before..
Sacrifice
this word have been bothering me for quite sometime...
i too tired to heard it...
now when i told my B bout this matter she feel so guilty and pity to A and everynight this have been bothering her from sleep and become moody, she even ask me to do somethin for her but the fact is wat can i do? must i place my leg on both bot??? NO i wouldn't do this i wont do something bad to the one i like...
wat should i do?
wat right did i have?
choosing A will make B hurt while choosing B will make A feel hurt..
must i hurt one of them?
wat should i do? wat should i do?
i dunno how should i face both of them now... could GOD help me?

SACRIFICE...

2009-04-06T22:16:00.004+08:00

I'm not GOD..I'm just a normal human why does i need to sacrifice for everyone and everything???
I'm not born to be a good guy... why do i need to do sacrifice for others to make them live happily and i'm suffering myself here for nothing???
I'm tired...
Tired to behave like myself..
No one would know wat happening accept the ownself

It's been a while..

2009-03-26T12:22:00.002+08:00

It's been a while since everythin happen...
Back to lonely life again..
A life which none bother wat are u doing..
Or maybe a world which free from anyone and free to do watever..
A lot of plan was in the mind... But it seems nothing work..
Was plan to continue study in this coming MAY intake in OUM, but it seems to be so lost and dunno heading where yet.. None of the family members know bout it except close fren..
Going through it was still wondering in mind..
Was plan to change work.. But might have been scare..
Have been lose too much this few month, dun hope would lose anythin anymore in this year.. Was scare now, scare to change work, becoz might lose all the job but this field income doen't satisfy the living style nowadays or either support to continue study at OUM.. HOW???
No one to refer to..
No one to get support..
No one who care...
Everyone was just thought am living in a good life..
Have a Job..
Have More Than Enough Income every month..
Have a good life..
Is this wat people see?
WHY?? Did u all see inside, around and all the situation that happening?
Hope there was a help....
A hand to save me out of this trap which have been trap in it for few years..

In The Memory

2009-03-19T12:17:00.002+08:00

Everythin is over now...
Life's getting back to where i've start..
Happy moment have ended..
It's been to fast,
Too fast for me to accept wat have happen.
Been pass a month for wat have happen, but still it's in my memory.
Seeing her from far when there's a chance, it's been making me feel more suffer.
But think back bout promise that have been made, feel i'm sorry..
Sorry for can't do wat i have been promise..
Life is getting back to normal, everythin is normal.
Nothing special in life since somethin have happen..
still Miss all the time, been feeling u are not safe when not with me anymore,
I dunno why but it just appear in my heart when i see u passing by the shop,
a shop in a mall which full of our memory to me,
I've been wonder are u really can treat it as nothing happen but u just giving me a feeling u are still with our memory...
It's been a long walk seens we start.. many thing have gone through.. gone through my life and giving me sweet and sad memory..
Will it just stop here?
Will our friendship carry on?
i've been do too much of wrong things in ur memory i hope i could erase it.. but i dun wish u will forget me...
Missing is hurt..
really hurt me since apart..
MISS

Wat Happen???!!

2009-03-10T21:00:00.002+08:00

Is this my LIFE?
I was wondering.. In one day i lost every hope and things i have..
I lost the one i love and my academic...
Nothing left.. Only me alone in the dark way which dunno wat is coming in the future..
My future was dark..
My road was dark..
I can't see anythin ahead me..
Wat have happen?
Is this wat we call life?
No hope No wish No plan..
And wat i facing everyday is a piece of shit..
Nothing else..Only me and Shit that happen to me everyday everynight..
Am i suppost to be like this?
is this wat i meant to be?
Is this wat god wan it to happen to me?
Isn't it there's a way for me to get out of this darkness?
It's full of shit here.. When am i getting out of this dark hole?
Could anyone save me other than myself???
Life is sucks...
Is give up a good solution?
If it does help i would..
Can anyone give me a proper solution?

Quote of the day

2009-03-02T21:12:00.003+08:00

"Watever u give a woman, she will make greater.
If u give her sperm, she will give u a baby.
If u give her a house, she will u a home.
If u give her groceries, she'll give u a meal.
If u give a smile, she will give u a heart.
She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.
So if u give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit."

Wan some test? Let see how dirty minded are u?

2009-02-25T13:01:00.004+08:00

1st...
concentrate...
2nd...
concentrate...
3rd..
scroll down slowly...(must be very very slowly, believe me...)

wait

wait

are u ready?

Etiqa Takaful

2009-02-16T19:48:00.004+08:00

I would like to use my blog to announce something to u all,

Recently i have join a group..
when i told everyone they might say i was doing direct sales but wat i doin now was not totally direct sales...
please dun scare o avoid me when i push this thing to u all... i have been notice few of my fren was scare when i telling them this...

Let me introduce it at here..

ETIQA TAKAFUL...

i bet some of u who read this might have heard it before ad...
but somehow u all was not totally know wat is it about right?

This was a plan which is provide by mayban group..

Basically this was a chance which goverment was giving to malay people to earn more income and saving but now it's open to chinese and indian..
and it's a new market for direct sales sector..

wat is ETIQA?
it's a saving plan which provide u 80% profit out of ur saving..
beside it also provide every saving account owner to get a protection fee..

how does it work?
every month u just need to save a min RM100 till 30 years and u would get a 2 to 3 times of ur total saving which means min around 90k while u only save around 35k..
for us which is just reaching age of 20, it's actually a right time to start this saving so by the age of 50 we would able to retire and enjoy our life...

Why am i interested to this?
It's becoz i feel tat with this thing i would help to provide my fren a better life when they are old.. with an amount of money which might help them to no need work becoz nowadays EPF is no enough to provide money to us when we were old..
I'm not doing this for the sake to earn money but to help u all... if u all willing to let me help let me know...o if u all was interested to know more can inform me too..

Hope u all wont avoid me becoz i'm working at this particular sector which most of the human scare to listen to it..

Have a nice day

last word
"Isn’t it ideal that while you carefully set aside money for savings, you get protected as well? Growing your wealth this way lets you enjoy better peace of mind while financially enabling you to plan for the good things in life."

A love story just end here... Shit happen...out of no reason

2009-02-09T20:11:00.003+08:00

Here's a story...
It start wit a guy who is so lost in his life...
been survive in this world for more than 18 years but dunno wat he wan..
all he know is "when people happy he happy"..

After all he have went to a new secondary skul to further his study and..
there he meet someone..
which change his life direction, giving him care and watever he dun have before this...
This guy was in love so much wit the girl...
he like her very much and feel that could die without her..
he scare to loose her everytime they apart...
but life is life...
everything is not in our control...
The girl just voice out wanna break wit him...
he have been cry for 2 days, sad for 2 days, missing her for 2 days...
and in that 2 day he didn't eat sleep and drink much..
after all he plan to discuss wit the girl..
and he know the girl still like him and she wanna do so just for the sake of this guy...
so this guy choose wat the girl choose and the end up with fren...
this sucks..
Story Moral: Always appreciate wat u have, life is not in our control... no matter how well u think it is someday it gonna screw up in anyway...
do not expect much when somethin bad happen...
life is life...
Hope the guy will live happily as wat the girl wish...
This guy was sucks and useless in built relation...
Hope he would learn from wat he face

Great philosophy of life

2009-02-02T20:08:00.001+08:00

This is good philosophy of Life and I would like to share with all of you.

A long time ago, there was an Emperor who told his horseman that if he
could ride on his horse and cover as much land area as he likes, then
the Emperor would give him the area of land he has covered.

Sure enough, the horseman quickly jumped onto his horse and rode as
fast as possible to cover as much land area as he could. He kept on
riding and riding, whipping the horse to go as fast as possible. When
he was hungry or tired, he did not stop because he wanted to cover as
much area as possible.

He came to a point when he had covered a substantial area and he was
exhausted and was dying. Then he asked himself, 'Why did I push myself
so hard to cover so much land area? Now I am dying and I only need a
very small area to bury myself.'

The above story is similar with the journey of our Life. We push very
hard everyday to make more money, to gain power and recognition. We
neglect our health, time with our family and to appreciate the
surrounding beauty and the hobbies we love.
One day when we look back, we will realize that we don't really need
that much, but then we cannot turn back time for what we have missed.

Life is not about making money, acquiring power or recognition. Life
is definitely not about work! Work is only necessary to keep us living
so as to enjoy the beauty and pleasures of life. Life is a balance of
Work and Play, Family and Personal time. You have to decide how you
want to balance your Life. Define your priorities, realize what you
are able to compromise but always let some of your decisions be based
on your instincts. Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of Life,
the whole aim of human existence.

So, take it easy, do what you want to do and appreciate nature. Life
is fragile, Life is short. Do not take Life for granted. Live a
balanced lifestyle and enjoy Life!

Wat is love???? Wat will u do if u really like someone??

2009-01-30T12:27:00.004+08:00

I would like u all to comment on this post..
Wat is LOVE???
Wat will u do if u love someone and he/she was in love wit other people??
if u were in this case wat will u do?
i would really like to know wat will most of u do for him/her..

If ur gf/bf was already wit another guy/girl
wat will u do??
will u keep on disturb him/her??
by present him somethin that u will make her/him feel guilty for break wit u??
by making her/him feel that he/she is wrong to break wit u??

and in other case...
if ur gf/bf was disturb by his/her ex bf...
wat will u do???

i have a fren who facing this problem...
i dunno how could i help him..
can anyone let me now wat should i do??
i was the one encourage them to be together before this and know they are facing this problem that i dun think it should happen...
sad ending...
the are break now... wat should i do??
wat is LOVE??

Was a nice party at first...

2009-01-13T12:20:00.002+08:00

was a nice birthday party..
celebrate for this two mofo which have been more old than us..
haha...
but still so proud of themself been turning into 20..
pada hal sudah tua...
haha

use to be enjoying the party tat night but...
suddenly a call approach...
sister calling and said that was a problem at home...
make the enjoying feeling disappear from my mind and i have to leave early...
sad...
but when i reach home i notice that i still none stop thinkin to go back to the party for the second round which i have promise blackie to stay that night...
Sad...

Hope u all enjoy that night dude..
happy birhtday...

Here Start A New Year...

2009-01-07T20:08:00.003+08:00

Everyone gonna face a new challenge..
a new target
a new journey
a new quest
a new problem...

but now everyone seen to be getting ready for a new year...
but i'm still wondering around...
wondering how am i going to celebrate new year with a wallet which dun have resources..
wondering how is she at there...
wondering wat is my destined..

life is full of question to me...
when am i going to get all the answer for my question?
who gonna help me?
wat should i do?
wat is my forthcoming?
It's full of wat wat wat who who who why why why when when when....

4 tr1p t0 m3l4k4

2008-12-26T22:08:00.003+08:00

was a nice plan of trip actually..
was plan long time ago..
a nice time for me to release myself out of stress..
work stress and family..
but i dun think i really enjoy it much..
maybe becoz she wasn't on my side but at least i have fren still..

the most worse part was the taman mini..
after paying RM12 to see crap in it when we are taking picture we are getting charges some more...
was a suck taman mini i went to..
was suck man

R1ght H3r3 W41t1ng 4 u

2008-12-21T13:51:00.001+08:00

Oceans apart day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn’t stop the pain

If I see you next to never
How can we say forever

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I took for granted, all the times
That I though would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can’t get near you now

Oh, can’t you see it baby
You’ve got me goin’ CrAzY

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I’m with you
I’ll take the chance

Oh, can’t you see it baby
You’ve got me goin’ cRaZy

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

this is the song just suit wat i wanna tell u all the way..
no matter wat have happen to us in the comin days...
i'll still remain the same...
i'll still miss u and wait for u..
i miss u...

Again a sad ending..

2008-12-19T19:03:00.003+08:00

Thought today will be a nice day..
after so long only she willing to meet me again...
but at last end up a sad ending also..
i miss her..
miss her hug a lot...
wanted her to stay with me as long as possible but wat have happen is only 30 mins..
sad..
and i made her very suffer again..
i was forcing her to do somethin which she dun wan..
so selfish..
now only i notice i'm being so selfish all the way..
only wanna meet her but didnt though of her condition and situation..
and i was doing somethin more selfish yesterday night which make her cry more than an hour
useless..
not worth loving..
a sad evening...

never break 4 things in ur life-trust,promise,relation&heart becoz when they break they dont make noise but pains a lot..

2008-12-18T20:01:00.003+08:00

i have go through 1 of this and it really hurt me..
i can't change anythin now..
and i hurt her also..
once and once 1 break the same thing...
she is so angry wit me now..
i have no right to say anythin to her..
i hurt her...
hope she can forgive me soon..

i'm not worthher to suffer so much and she is being suffer now...
i dunno wat to do..
just dun wanna loose her...
love is very complicated to me..
and this was my first love.. i love her a lot...
miss...
hope i'm not loosing her..
feeling so scare to loose her..
i'm not good enough, i always hurt her,that's why i was trying to treat her as good as i can but seems like she dun wan me to do that...
haiz...
love seems to be so complicated to me...