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There are lot kind of relationship but which of those relationship do u think it will last the longest??
Love?? friend?? or watever that u can state out?? (PM me)
to me...
all those relation is like so meaningless, all mankind mind are so easily change..

now they might be ur best friend, later u are just someone they know o someone u hate,

after all... forget this person and all the past ad,
does us as a human should behave like this?
Have seen a lot this kind of attitude since i was small from those elder and i choose not to believe in this statement,
but.. when i have really come into this world, what i have found is, all the relationship will not last long.. even someone say "u are best friend la!!","BRO.. u are always my bro!!" these word doesn't last long in their heart, am i correct???
even some husband and wife also would not last long. this is prove!
but why?? if as a husband and wife relationship also cant last long then which type of relation only can last long?
Was wondering this question for a long time but somehow i got no answer and another question appear! Why do i care so much?? Why do i did the best as i can to maintain every kind of relationship?? since watever i did also will produce the same result.. should i give up?? should i??
Maybe i too care..
Maybe is becoz i prefer long long relationship..
I care for everyone around me, everyone..
but.. wat i get?? getting more and more lonely day by day..
Getting very tired nowadays for being wat i am, for doing wat i did all the past,
Relationship is wat??
It is just something making me tired and more tired everyday.

The other side of myself

Phobia of meet people have grow stronger..
People is asking me nowadays.. Wat have happen to u?? wat have happen?? are u ok??
and wat i can only say is "I'm fine, still survive!"...
I'm getting more and more cruel nowadays..
Maybe becoz of the loneliness feeling in my heart all the while have lead me to change,
feel alone all the day and night have make me getting sick..
seeing everyone laughing so happily sometime just make me feel more sad..
especially seeing u with a beautiful smile in those pict which rarely i can see in the past..
and this have lead me to think that everyone of u were living happily without me but with my exist around u all those smiles just disappear easily.. like i were just meant to be a spoiler to ruin all the beautiful things that happen in this world

Employee..

As a good employee u must always be in the best condition no matter what is the goal being set...
Keeping urself update is very important also..
Achieve the goal is most important part..
Been do all the best for my company 1 year and 7 months..
been achieve the most highest sales and profit outlet in this company..
since then, boss were very look up on me..
In this year, i have been promoted twice from staff to assistant supervisor then again to supervisor and in charge in a broken outlet which he hope that i would drag up this outlet to something like the previous outlet i work..
never been thought that this will be a though road until pass a month of being promote to supervisor position..
the goal too high.. the tension i having is too much till i have been headache for week ad.. everything is like empty.. no database, no staff that can be rely, no customer, no sales.. been try really hard to achieve higher profit ad but sales were down..
thought that at least profit have gain boss wont be so depress but..
result i get was not wat i expected.. feedback i get was he totally upset with my performance which i provide to this outlet..
Hoping there is some increase in sales and profit next month and hit the target..
working as a employee is always not easy.. once ur performance was not good surely u going to receive negative feedback..

The feeling that never end..

I was on friendster just now..
I see picture of her in her fren profile..
My heart were stun for few second once i reach the pict which got her,
i thought it was my wrong feeling,
after a while i see her in another pict again..
same effect appear, i get stun again..
the same feeling like i get stun in first time..
never thought that this feeling would appear again but it just come out suddenly..!
wat should i do??
wat should i do??
can i just ignore it?
wat else can be done??
it's already been long time ago..
why the feeling..........
arrgh!!
struggling now...
Shit.. should i continue???
help!!

Distance

The neglected house is getting more and more cold recently,
the surrounding have change a lot too..
people were moving out from here to others location and plan for their life..
but this empty house have never change..
situated in the same location and same goal..
wishing someone to enter the house..
wish that someone can make it warm back..
wish that he would provide help and happiness to people around him..
but no one knows he is being neglected..
no one knows that he do need help..
and everyday while he was trying to help people around him he is getting weaker and weaker..
helping people without hoping for pay back and even helping people with loss from himself..
close house is moving one by one to other location due to some change in life..
but this empty house still remain there..
while the distance is getting further and further..
this empty house day by day is getting colder and colder...
neglected feeling is also getting stronger..
no friend around, no real friend which can believe to talk to..
feeling unsafe and lonely all the moment of life from now on...

felling sick all the while have made this empty house to feel more lonely and cold..
even sick he is still helping the others..


hope i was not like the empty house.. feeling lonely is real sucks..
good luck to empty house..

Wat is love about?

Love?? thought i have been through a deep one before and were believe she was the only one know and care the most bout me even treat her as my soul mate like no one can replace her, even try to let go everything just to be with her, just to see her, sacrifice that never end... let go all my on hand job even dun care i will lost everything in this world just to be with her just to see her, find out all the possible way to meet her.. but now.. i heard that all the relation between us were just becoz u care and know bout me the most.. if this was the reality i really dunno what should i say.. my soul mate have turn down to a true friend which willing to give me everything she have.. and i still believe that she know me the most till that day she ask me am i punisher and thought i were so stupid go pretend another guy just to make my life busier.
Is this still called love?
I love her , i sacrifice every shit just for her, but ended up?
tear droping, which been not drops from my eye since i were 12 yrs old i guess, not even the day one of my best fren pass away...
worry her like death coming next second for every moment that she doesn't message me..
not able to eat anything when she were not contact me for more than few hour..
can't sleep at night if i didnt receive a call from her..
admit that i am wrong everytime we quarrel...
quit smoking..
message her whenever she can-nearly lost my job once becoz were told by my head that i keep on messaging and not working properly..
driving without heart.. almost accident for times.. just a few cm away to meet death..
drunk every week..
daily sleep for only 4 hours even the day i were sick..
I have been do my best to remain this relation but wat have happen??
And now? my reputation have totally gone in some of u all i guess..
maybe i just dont deserve to be love by others...
all i hope is just a long relationship with her but ended up?



shit man..!! why am i wasting my time typing all this shit?? It's over..IT"S OVER!!!
now.. wat i know is.. if i were still continue with her i'm sure one day i gonna be dead.. break up and together break up and together back make me really suffer..
and before i end this post i just wanna add something someone have told me before, and quite sure she will remember it
"NO ONE WERE RIGHT OR WRONG IN A RELATIONSHIP"

Judge

As a human which survive in earth, i think everyone have done a mistake even jesus did that i guess but.. how many of them will realize it? Not until the day they lost something! I'm just a simple human, i do did wrong thing before but i did done some correct thing also.. but how many percent of each thing in right and wrong that i have done will being notice by the pupil around??
100% wrong things that i done will totally here and there at peoples' mouth and end up created another story and only 10% of good thing only that i have done being known by people around.. What is this?? Is it all the human like to see things from only one side? After listening to one side conversation, directly the other side will just get blame beside the listener was not realize what have really happen and not even interested to go find out the answer!!
FUCK!! is all the human in this world see things only from their own side and not the others??
Be civilize man!! what era are us now man?? U are living in this mature world compare to last time but your mind is still so retarded??
Kinda tired to see people around me judge someone without seeing what have really happen! Maybe by not a fair judging might make u all feel happier and live better.. if so does u feel! then carry on... but one day, i am sure one day, u will remember back what have u read today in my blog...